Sometimes when we do everything right, things still go wrong. On a much deeper level this is a struggle everyone grapples with at some point in their life. Most of us many times. Children die, marriages crumble, and dreams crash to the ground. People betray us, our intentions are misread, a freak accident and we are left bewildered. We cant even catch our breath. Why do bad things happen to good people? Why, when we live life the way we should, do things still go wrong? This question seems easy enough to answer when someone else asks it. We rattle off pat answers like, God is in control, or God can use it. But when we find ourselves asking these questions those pat answers seem hollow and abrasive. No comfort. No answer can be found that soothes the soul.
What do we do when life piles up? We all know those people in our lives that seem to be a magnet for difficulty. Hard times seem to be their majority. The hits just keep coming and coming and we look to God in our confusion. What do we say? How do we love them without seeming fake and shallow? How do we walk with them through the hard times? And what do we do when we are that person?
Today, after mopping up my morning coffee, I read Psalm 73. Its not an easy chapter. It's blunt. Its coarse honesty makes you uneasy. And yet it gave me hope. If scripture can be brutally honest then maybe I can also be nakedly honest with God. In the beginning of the chapter the author whines and complains about those he sees who are corrupt yet rich, healthy, and without trouble. Listen to the words of the author in verse 16, "When I tried to understand all this it was oppressive to me" Verse 13 says, "Surely in vain have I kept my heart pure; in vain have I washed my hands in innocence." Do you hear this pity party here folks? I did what I was supposed to and am sick, poor, and in pain. Others do wrong and are rich and healthy. WHY GOD?! You can hear the bitterness in the tone.
In verse 21 it says, "When my heart was grieved and my spirit embittered, I was senseless and ignorant; I was a brute beast before you." He is calling himself out on his own actions. He calls himself a brute beast! The author feels betrayed and can't figure out how on earth God applied his permission on his specific situation. In scripture we find that God does not cause all things, but He does permit all things(see Romans 5:12 and James 1:13). This permission is what hurts the most in difficult times.
When we are in pain our focus gets skewed. We forget our equality in the human race. Romans 3:10 says, "There is no one righteous, not even one" We are all unworthy of any good in our lives. Any sins we have committed have condemned us to a forever sentence of hell. What we tend to lose focus of is that all we deserve is the bad.
Now please don't take me as a doom sayer. There is a great ending on this story. The gift that Jesus rendered on the cross reveals an unimaginable twist. Jesus paid our death sentence. He did for us what we could not do for ourselves. He paid a price too high for our own actions to compensate. He saved us. And what is amazing is that he put no price on receiving his gift. "Free!" he calls out to us. "Come and receive. I have taken care of this!" Now, think about God's roll in this. The father has knowingly sacrificed his son so that all of humanity would have the opportunity to spend eternity with Him in heaven. He provided a way for us to be forgiven. And what do we do?
There seem to be three responses I have concluded to. First, you have the ones who simply say "no". They snub their noses to the fact that someone else provided a fix to their problem. What is so frustrating is that their choice doesn't negate the fact that Jesus died on the cross. Instead its just a smack in the face to God that says, "I don't want your help" "I did not ask Jesus to do what he did."
Second, you have the Yes, but. This is the person that accepts Jesus Christ as their Savior but brings with them a list of requirements. They say things like, "Thank you for saving me Jesus, but I want life to be easy from here out." or "Thank you for saving me Jesus, but I want control over how things go from here." Their Christian walk is fraught with crisis after crisis because they don't know what to do when things go awry. I think if we were honest this is where a lot of us find ourselves. Maybe in different degrees of the "yes, but" syndrome but its where most of us are. We get stuck. We get angry. We claim to trust God, but when push comes to shove we point the finger right back at God. We struggle. How is there freedom from that?
We find freedom in the third response. James McDonald talks about growing our faith in God. He says growing ones faith is not done perfectly, but it needs to be done increasingly. In other words, we need to show fruit of growth in our trust in God. This is where hard shows up. When we become Christians we trust God with our life after death but what about our life here on earth? When we can't understand the reasoning behind life's difficult situations we have to choose to trust. In each situation that we do choose to trust we receive the gift of proof. Proof that God can be trusted. Proof that God is a keeper of his word. Proof that Matthew 28:20 is true when it says, "And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age." As we mature in our Christian walk we start finding ourselves more on the third view and less and less on the second. Its a process. And a slow one at that.
God does not promise that once we accept Jesus as our Savior that our lives will be easy and problem free. But he does offer an amazing gift. The creator of the universe offers to walk with us through life so that when it gets too hard, and it will, He will be with us. You see when life is easy we do not see as much need for God in our lives as we do when we are living in difficulty. Now, that is not to say that the only reason God allows trials is to deepen relationship between us and Him. That would be cruel.
But God does refine and give opportunity to strengthen our faith through hard to swallow events. And then those events that seemed impossible to traverse end up becoming a reference point. A tangible moment in time that we see God at work and feel his presence. They become moments we return to the next time we are confronted with hardship. And as we collect those amazing moments of proven faith before us, our relationship deepens and our desperate need to understand the "why" dissipates.
It all comes down to one prayer. "Lord, whatever it takes. Whatever you need from me Lord. Take what needs to be taken. Keep what needs to be kept. As long as you use my life to bring others closer to you Father. As long as I can be drawn closer to you. Have your way Father." As we draw closer to God we need fewer explanations. We trust and know that He is good because even though we have experienced difficulties we have also seen God's faithfulness during those times.
Many mornings when my quiet time is interrupted I get mad. I get a bit self righteous and shake that finger at God. I am the second response we talked about earlier. But increasingly, yet not perfectly, I am learning to quench my temper and rest in the knowledge that God can be trusted. I don't always understand and the bigger the situation the harder it is to take that step and trust. But even though my coffee cup is shattered on the floor my trust is in tact. My God is good. Chapter 73 in Psalms ends perfectly with these words, "But as for me, it is good to be near God. I have made the Sovereign LORD my refuge; I will tell of all your deeds."
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